Events are great places where you can meet a massive variety of people. That said, when networking, you’re bound to meet some individuals that fit these archetypes perfectly.
1. The Salesman
One of the most affable people in the room, the salesman is a wheeler-dealer. A true salesman will try and sell you their product there and then. If they’re really good at it, you’ll walk away from them with a signed contract, a Parker pen and a general sense of confusion over what just happened.
2. The Distraction
The distraction will lure you into the most interesting conversation of the afternoon. They’ll be funny and entertaining and a joy to be around. However, 45 minutes into your thoroughly interesting conversation about Game of Thrones or Ice Hockey or the works of Van Gogh, you’ll realize you just spent most of your business networking session talking to one person about irrelevant topics, and making no other connections whatsoever. Get the distracter’s number, because you two may become great friends, but don’t pass the whole session with them.
3. The Zoomer
It won’t matter to you if this person is the nicest, most interesting person in the room, or a terror – you won’t be seeing them for long either way! At an hour-long 100 person networking session, they want to know every single person in the room… Well, they want to know their names. The zoomer has no time to stop and chat. The zoomer is far too busy for that.
4. The Newcomer
The only thing their pitch is missing is flashcards. They’re overexcited and nervous and so passionate about their new startup. Their passion is refreshing, even if it could use a little taming!
5. The Shameless Self-Promoter
Ok, so we’ll admit, we love a bit of shameless self-promotion (is now the right time to tell you about Pickevent?). But, at a networking event, the shameless self-promoter tells you their idea, and then the moment they realize you’re not rolling in cash, their eyes glaze over, and you can practically see them looking for an escape route. They’re a close cousin of the salesman, but a lot less subtle about their intentions.
6. The Patroniser
They may be the most successful person in the room. Their business may be a little ahead of yours. They may just have a massively inflated sense of self worth. Whatever the reason, the patroniser will smirk as you explain your business idea, refer to you as ‘quaint’ or ‘a dreamer’, and then list all the ways your company will fail.
7. Daddy Warbucks
A hush will come over the room when Daddy Warbucks enters. Whether he’s a famous angel investor or a big name in the industry, you know he could invest big, be it financially or intellectually. Unfortunately, everyone else in the room also knows this, and the queue of people waiting to network with him is longer than his private jet.
What types of people have we missed?